Divorce is a very personal event between two people, but it is rarely private. It’s more like a pebble in a pond. Many other people are in the water with you and will feel the waves that your divorce creates. It might not feel like it, but you have a lot of control over the waves; the number, the size and the duration. At the outset, it’s a good idea to take a moment to consider all of those who share your pond and determine whether they will be buoyed or drowned by the waves of your divorce.
Friends & Family. Obviously, your children will be involved in the changes to your family, as will your extended families and friends to the extent that you invite them. Choose your support network wisely. Carefully decide how much you want to disclose. Once it’s out there, you can’t get it back.
Also remember that the reactions of those closest to you are often based on their perception of how you are handling things. You’ve seen this happen. It’s no different than when a child stumbles, falls, and then looks to those nearby to gauge how they should react.
If you’re upset, they will be. If you make a funny face and laugh, they will too. If you’re angry, they will be. If you are thoughtfully seeking to understand your options, and getting the assistance you need to care for yourself, then they will help you with those things.
Don’t be afraid to speak up to those who do not take your cues. They can be a gale force wind, turning your small waves into big ones.
Discerning Divorce, Inc. 
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